Memories on the Wall

What a week.

I'll be honest, I was dreading this past week. The idea of spending the week in Mitchell didn't exactly make me want to jump up and click my heals. I wasn't real sure how the week was going to go, but it went so much better than I could have imagined.

I had a small cabin this year. My usual girls were unable to come this year, so we had a different group of girls. I had Moyra, of course. Then I had four girls from Newburgh, which I found funny because I now live in Newburgh. I had a real awkward group of girls, but let's be honest I'm awkward so it was probably a good fit.

I was real proud of these girls. As usual, I had the oldest group of girls. Sunday, I told them that they should be setting a good example for the younger girls, and they did not let me down. In fact, one of my campers got Camper of the Week. I was very proud of her.

Instead of having Split Chapel as we normally do, we had a Bible Bowl. This week was based around Ephesians 6:10-18, which is all about the Armour of God. Thus, the Bible Bowl was all about Ephesians. Ephesians is my favorite book from the Bible. My girls beat out the other three girls cabins with a final score of 152 points for the week. That was the highest score from all the cabins. They competed against the winning boys cabin, and came in 2nd in over time. I was pleased.

My family group this year was a fun group of kids. For recreation, family groups, competed in the SMBC Olympics. My kids took home the gold. Once again, I was pleased.

Thursday night was our cabin party, and anyone who knows me knows I make those cabin parties count. We had ourselves a dance party, and since I am somewhat of a prankster, the other two female cabins were under attack. It got my girls out of their comfort zones and got them to loosen up. It was a good night.

I have to say my favorite part of the week happened on Friday. One of the girls from my cabin asked me to baptize her. Typically in the Church of Christ, women do not baptize people. However, I was given the opportunity to do it. It was my first baptism, and it was such an honor. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it.

It was a good week and I got to share it with three of my little cousins (Moyra, Trey, and Lizzy), and with Rebecca and Melissa. It's hard to have a bad week with that group. I'm glad that Moyra and Lizzy talked me into coming home for the week. Just think of everything I would've missed out on had I not come.

Hands down, the best week of my summer.

Home Is Where The Heart Is

Home is where the heart is.

That is such a heavy statement.

I mean really. Think about it. Where your heart is, is where your home is.

The first question I have to ask myself is 'where is my heart?'. Does my heart lay where my thoughts are? Does it lay with the important people in my life? And if it does, who are those people? And why are they important to me? Why do I allow them to have part of me? What makes them so special? Why do they matter?

I have always tried to find peace through my relationships with other people. The thing is, I never can find peace in my relationships. I find comfort for a while, but never actual peace.

I do things to the extreme. When I love, I love with everything I have. When I hate, I hate with everything I have. I put everything I have into my relationships with others, in the hopes of finding peace within those relationships; however, because I do this, I tend to find more trouble then peace.

Matthew 6:19-21 (And I'm going to paraphrase this) says "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

My treasures on earth aren't things but people, which is probably more unhealthy then if my worldly treasures were things. Things can be replaced, and people can not. So when (It's always a question of when, not if.) I start to get myself into trouble within those relationships, it feels like the end of the world. It takes a mental, emotional, and physical toll on me.

That's not healthy.

This is something I've been thinking about lately. When I'm here in Evansville I do not feel at home so I go back to Mitchell, but I do not feel at home there either. No matter where I am, I just want to be somewhere else. The problem is not an external problem, but an internal one. "Where ever you go, there you are." I really am my worst enemy.

I realize now that I can not continue to try and find peace in my relationships. The only relationship I should be trying to find peace in is my relationship with God. That is where my heart should be.

I'm thankful that he continues to be faithful in my life while I figure all this out. That is true, unconditional love.

Where is your heart?